Let's be honest with ourselves here - we've all had moments of weakness when it comes to food. It's one of those guilty pleasures that catches up with the best of us, and most of the time, we don't actually know what it is we're putting into our bodies. That can be very, very scary, but at the time, it's safe to say that none of us really give it a second thought.
It's only after the fact that we're left to feel a bit weird about it, whether that be due to food pains or simply because you're starting to overthink the circumstances surrounding your health. Whatever the case may be there's simply no denying that there are some truly unhealthy foods out there for you, and in particular, the United States of America is a shining example of that.
We aren't suggesting it's all bad over there because they do have some healthy alternatives, but there's a reason why their figures are all so bad when it comes to obesity and all things food related. They don't seem to know when to stop going bigger and bigger with the offerings they put out to the world, and that's slightly worrying.
As a nation, they need to learn to step back and really analyse what's happening. Things are in a precarious state and certain measures need to be taken, but have things gone too far?
Of course if you want to try these meals in moderation then go for it, but we aren't so comfortable with the idea.
25 Double Down KFC
You may like KFC, but do you like KFC this much?
The Double Down sandwich has been introduced in Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurants the world over, and yet, many of you probably haven’t even heard of it. The 610-calorie monstrosity replaces the traditional bread rolls or ‘buns’ with two pieces of chicken, with cheese, bacon and a secret sauce being put in the middle.
As appetising as that may seem, we still think we’re going to stick to the popcorn chicken for now – and that’s not because it doesn’t look amazing, it’s because we’d probably never be able to stop eating.
24 Deep Fried Big Mac
If you decided to have a double Big Mac, which is available in the majority of McDonald’s restaurants around the world, then you’d be consuming roughly 680 calories.
While there’s no distinct figure on just how much that is in comparison to the Deep Fried edition, we’re going to go out on a limb here and suggest that it’s still quite a lot.
A Big Mac is a nice treat every so often but we just feel like making it deep fried ruins it a little bit. Some foods need to be left alone, and this falls into the category.
23 Deep Fried Oreos
You may find Oreos unbelievably irresistible, guys, but we aren’t so sure that’d be the case if you saw them being deep fried.
Maybe you enjoy the process or the eventual end product but it just doesn’t look particularly satisfying. Traditional Oreos are simple and to the point, but deep fried Oreos seem like they could get a little bit messy.
If you’re feeling festive then we’d recommend the white-covered Oreos, because you know, it’s Christmas time – and a treat or two (but that’s it) won’t hurt you.
P.S: If you’ve ever eaten any of these and lived to tell the tale, let us know.
22 Octuple Bypass Burger
The Heart Attack Grill is a restaurant in Las Vegas, Nevada that specialises in burgers that, to put it bluntly, will give you a heart attack if eaten regularly.
The gimmick behind the restaurant is worth an entire piece itself, but we probably don’t have enough time to discuss just how awesome it is (although we use the term awesome loosely).
The burger in question contains 20,000 calories and has 40 slices of bacon, lots of chilli, lots of cheese and god only knows what else.
It is absolutely crazy in every way imaginable, and it’s quite the experience to go to Vegas and try it for yourself.
21 Pigs In a Blanket in a Pizza
Pizzas have come a long way over the course of the last few decades, in the sense that everyone seems to be hell-bent on creating new and improved recipes or styles that will make for a fun and entertaining meal.
Since it’s Christmas time this seems like a particularly suitable entry, as this pizza’s crust has been replaced by around a dozen pigs in blankets. For those of you who don’t know, pigs in blankets are little cocktail sausages that have been wrapped up in bacon – and they’re absolutely delicious, but again, very addictive.
Eat at your own risk!
20 Sloppy Joes
Sloppy Joes are an American tradition, but we aren’t so sure that’s a good thing. It’s a sandwich that is full to the top with either beef or pork, tomato sauce, onions, Worcestershire sauce and a series of other seasonings. While that doesn’t sound like much they still like to fill it up as best as they can, as you can tell by literally any image of a Sloppy Joe in existence.
The average number of calories tends to come in at around 634 per sandwich with 27.1 g of fat. That, quite frankly, is an insane couple of numbers, and the fact that the sandwiches aren’t even considered that bad in comparison to other entries on this list is worrying.
19 Chicken & Waffles
There’s an awful lot of ‘variation’ that goes on with this particular dish, and we’ll leave it to you to decide whether or not that’s a good thing or a bad thing. Essentially it’s a meal in which you put waffles and chicken together, but often in the kind of quantities that would render you unable to move for a few hours after consumption.
The weirdest part of all is that they tend to put syrup on top of it, and in some instances, gravy too. It’s the definition of a weird combination, but as we all know, that’s never stopped the people of America before - so why should it now?
18 Maine Lobster
They say everything is bigger in the States, and we wholeheartedly believe them. While some refer to the classic American lobster as just that, many people know it to be the ‘Maine’ lobster because that’s where it primarily is found.
While lobster can be nice in moderation, this certainly doesn’t fit into that description. A Maine lobster can reach a length of 25 inches and could grow to be over 44 pounds before being cooked, which is absolutely insane.
It may be delicious but just think about the number of calories you’d be consuming in a standard sitting. Utter madness.
17 Pitts Burger
Have you ever just decided to throw everything into a sandwich in order to see what happens? The answer is probably yes because we’ve all done it, but our efforts probably don’t even remotely compare to the Pitts Burger (we love the name by the way).
In addition to the standard beef patty and tomatoes, the burger is also filled up with coleslaw and fries. Yes, you read that last part right, they actually put the fries inside the burger in order to it all in as opposed to having to eat it separately.
Surely that just increases the risk of a disaster?
16 Chicken Fried Steak
We love steak and goodness me we love chicken, but again, that doesn’t necessarily mean we want to put the two together.
The dish contains a piece of steak which is coated with seasoned flour and then pan-fried, and the end result is, erm, interesting. When you factor in the sheer volume of gravy that likely goes onto the plate with most Americans, it soon becomes clear that this is a dish which isn’t meant for those with health issues.
It’s quite similar to a schnitzel dish over in Austria, but as is usually the case, it feels like the Americans have taken it to a whole new level.
15 Bacon Donuts
You’d think that the fact this is a maple bacon donut would mean it came from the Great White North in Canada, but you’d be oh so wrong. Bacon donuts have been described as the perfect ‘camping breakfast’ given that it kind of gets everything in there in one go, but it doesn’t even seem like people can even decide which shape is right, let alone whether or not it’s a good idea.
There’s just so much going on with some folks only using dashes of bacon, whereas others just lather it in the stuff (as well as the aforementioned syrup). We aren’t here to tell you not to enjoy this delicious treat, but perhaps you should only indulge once every six months or so.
14 Triple Stuffed Oreos
Oreos may be really nice in the eyes of some, but let’s face it, they’re absolutely awful for your health. Even if you set aside the fact they use high-fructose corn syrup in order to make them as well as vanillin, the figures on top of that are just staggering.
A standard Oreo contains around 45 calories in one cookie, meaning that if you triple stuffed them, that figure would go up to around 135 calories. For those of you out there who have physically seen what an Oreo looks like, you’ll understand why it’s absolutely insane for something that small to contain so many calories.
13 S’mores Tart
If you’ve ever been to an American camp-out or you’ve seen any kind of American television show or movie, you’ll be well aware of S’mores. They consist of a marshmallow and some chocolate in between a Graham cracker, and it even has a whole day dedicated to it.
Now, though, things are kind of getting out of hand. A S’mores tart is now an actual item that exists, and we can only imagine the calories involved. It’s like you’ve taken something that is relatively innocent, and you’ve completely turned it on its head.
What a sad state of affairs, folks.
12 Texas Smoked Brisket
A brisket is known as being a cut of meat from the breast of beef or veal, and it’s known for being, well, incredibly bad for you. So then – a Texas Smoked Brisket, as you can imagine, just duplicates that by quite a considerable margin.
The main ‘extra’ ingredient is a whole lot of salt, but of course, if you smoke something then it’s naturally going to make it even worse for you.
It may look appealing to some, but we’d be happy enough with the regular version as opposed to something that actively causes danger for our way of living.
11 Mac N Stack Burger
Mac-n-Cheese is the definition of a popular dish in the United States, and it’s not exactly hard to understand why if you’ve ever tried it. It has translated pretty well overseas, too, but it’s often recognised as being a very USA thing.
At the Nosh Kitchen Bar in Portland, however, they’ve only gone and upped themselves (as you’d expect given the nature of this list).
The food was deep fried in order to form the buns of the burger, and when you hear the words ‘deep fried’, you automatically know that things are going to end badly one way or the other.
10 Frito Pie
If you’re heading either to the South or the Midwest anytime soon, then in all likelihood, you’re going to see Frito pie quite a lot. It features cheese, chili, corn chips, usually salsa, and we can already feel our insides exploding.
Given that it’s an entire dish you can imagine just how excessive it can be, and if you can’t imagine it, just have a look at some of the images that can be found online.
It might be tasty, but again, there’s not a lot of green in there and the green that is in there is probably jalapenos.
9 Bronx Bomber Pizza
The Bronx Bomber Pizza is just about as insane and ridiculous as it looks and sounds, but we all know that some people reading this will be into that.
It’s part of a food challenge that can be found in Ohio and while it may look difficult, a lot of individuals have actually conquered it. It has an average weight of eight pounds, aka the size of a baby, and it’s stuffed full of bacon, sausage, ham, cheese and pepperoni.
We can imagine you’d come out of there as a completely different man or woman, and that’s very much understandable.
8 New York Cheesecake
While cheesecake, in general, isn’t great for you, the New Yorkers out there will be well aware of the fact that their version of cheesecake is a level above the rest. Honestly, just ask Chandler and Rachel from Friends.
The difference with an NY cheesecake is that it relies heavily upon lots and lots of cream, or often sour cream. There’s a very rich taste to it that makes it quite addictive (to say the very least), and there tends to be a higher quantity of it on average.
We like it, but to be honest, we don’t necessarily love it.
Ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes on a Turducken.
It’s a deboned chicken stuffed into a duck which is then stuffed into a turkey, and we’re fairly certain that we’ve just been sick in our mouth. When you add in a breadcrumb mixture or potentially even sausage meat it gets all the more horrifying, and yes, horrifying is indeed the word that we would use.
The name alone isn’t particularly imaginative, and to be honest, we don’t really think the meal itself is either. Sure it’s intriguing to a certain extent, but where does that intrigue begin and end?
Probably around the third or fourth mouthful, we’d assume.
6 Cheese Spray
The Americans seem to be fascinated with the idea of simplifying absolutely everything, and it’s not really an idea that we’ve ever been able to get on board with. Case in point: cheese spray. The Americans first brought it into the limelight way back in the 1970s, and ever since then, we’d certainly argue it’s been a bit of a whirlwind.
By whirlwind, we mean that literally everyone in America has tried it, and they shouldn’t. Cheese isn’t great for you so we can only imagine what this processed equivalent would do to your insides, and the worst part of it all is that it’s so easy to have it in excess.
5 Tasso Ham
Tasso ham takes ham to the extreme which, in itself, sounds like a really weird television advertisement. The Louisiana cuisine comes from a hog’s shoulder and is even more fatty than usual ham, as the muscle has an awful lot of flavour – which is why so many Americans love it.
It weighs around seven to eight pounds, and the process behind even cooking it sounds so exhausting. Of course, they do love their food in Louisiana so we can somewhat understand their logic behind taking so much care in their meal, but it doesn’t mean that it’s any less awful for you.
4 Ice Cream Burger
If you want facts and figures we can’t provide you with them here, because the bottom line is that ice cream burgers will just about give you diabetes upon sampling one bite of the stuff.
You’re putting together two incredibly bad things and, essentially, just seeing what sticks. It’s one of the best pieces of evidence we have that the people of America take their food ‘inventions’ so to speak, too far, and they need to be stopped!
We aren’t justice warriors or anything, but come on now, you’ve got to draw the line when enough is enough.
At least the colours look pretty.
3 Sweet Potato Casserole & Marshmallows
160.8 calories per serving.
It might be appealing but my god that’s a lot of consumption. The whole concept of the sweet potato casserole & marshmallows thing is a little bit baffling to us, too, mainly because we just don’t really want to get on board with the ‘sweet and savoury’ thing.
A lot of people are into it, but we aren’t of the belief that sweet potatoes would go with marshmallows. We understand that ‘sweet’ potatoes aren’t logistically viewed as being a savoury item, but come on now, they’re still potatoes.
By the way, why does everyone keep trying to ruin the innocence of marshmallows?
2 PB & J Burger
IT’S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME.
If you got the reference, then we applaud you.
Peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, as weird as they may sound to non-Americans, are a tradition amongst many families and friendship groups in the States. Alas, while that’s all well and good, we’d have to raise the red flag when it comes to adding them into a burger.
Some people actually put the PB&J into a cheeseburger, and we can’t really even begin to understand what that would taste like.
There would be so many flavours on display that our mouth just wouldn’t even know where to start.
1 Jumbo Pastrami Sandwich
The thing about pastrami is that it’s so unbelievably easy to pile it up with dozens and dozens of slices, that you could put just about any amount of slices in there and people probably wouldn’t even notice.
So then, a jumbo pastrami sandwich will probably leave you unable to move for a good day or two after consumption.
The taste would probably be incredible at the time, especially if you’re in New York City which is where it kind of originated, but meals like this will leave you weighing up the pros and cons before actually ordering – or, at least, that’s what you should be doing.