Going on your honeymoon is a magical and memorable moment for any newly married couple, regardless of whether or not they do immediately after the wedding or a few weeks later. There are many things 'expected' of couples when it comes to going on honeymoons as there are plenty of stereotypes out there, but in truth, you can do whatever you want to do.
You didn't exactly need us to be the ones to tell you that, but even so, it definitely feels like some folks have forgotten that. Of course, whether it be intentional or not, there are certain things that couples do that just kind of grind our gears. From the perspective of someone who may be watching their holiday unfold either in person or on social media, it's a lot to take.
We understand you're having the time of your life, but the nature of the internet means that we kind of have to try and bring you back down to earth a bit. That sounds unbelievably arrogant, and you know, that's probably because it kind of is.
We personally aren't anywhere close to being on a honeymoon so it may sound a little off coming from us, but we'll be the first ones to admit if we end up being a little bit hypocritical in a few years time.
Either way, just try and take what we say onboard, as opposed to launching into a verbal keyboard warrior-esque tirade - which we're all capable of doing from time to time.
25 Argue Way More Than You’d Think
Couples argue and if you think that they don’t, then we hate to break it to you, but you’re lying to yourself. In many ways it’s healthy to air your grievances for your partner to hear, because it means that you’ll be able to figure out the problem and then take the necessary steps to fix it.
Alas, when you’re on your honeymoon, it feels like the pressure intensifies. You know deep down that this is meant to be one of the happiest times of your life, and yet one little thing could set you off on a tirade that lasts for what feels like an eternity.
24 Share All Of Their Meals
This isn’t the Lady and the Tramp, folks.
One person orders one meal and one orders the other – it’s not that hard. It’s absolutely nauseating sometimes when you look over and see people sharing their food, because it just comes across as being so forced. You may believe that it’s cute and romantic, but the rest of the restaurant doesn’t want to have to see it.
Maybe we’re being grinches here, but it feels like the couple in question just aren’t aware of how they’re coming across.
Perhaps you should leave the food sharing for behind closed doors. Just our opinion!
23 Check In With Work Way Too Much
The nature of social media and technology ensures that we’re all pretty connected with what’s happening at work all the time. That can be a good thing as it means you don’t have to get on a computer to check your emails all the time, but if you’re slightly addicted to what you do for a living, it can throw up some issues.
Again, that’s just our opinion, but it certainly feels like there should be a limit to this kind of thing when you’re trying to relax with your partner. After all, they probably hear enough about it when you’re back home.
22 Do Water Sports They’re In No Way Prepared For
Water sports are a young man/woman’s game, and while you may think that you’re more than ready for the toll it takes on your body, you really aren’t. Sure, you may go into it thinking that you’ll make a lot of great memories, but you’ll come out of it with aches and pains that will last throughout the entire trip.
I guess it depends on what kind of sense of humour you have with this one. If you easily let things like this get you down then it could be a problem, but if you’re able to laugh it off, then it’s just awkward for the rest of us as opposed to everyone.
21 Try And Make Friends With Random Couples
Isn’t the whole point of a honeymoon to spend time with your newlywed? That’s what we’ve always been led to believe, and while socialising isn’t exactly a bad thing, there are limitations to that in our view.
The couple that you’re trying to befriend may not be all too interested in reciprocating those feelings, and we’re only saying that to be brutally honest. Maybe you’ll make life long friends, but in the end, it could just be a holiday fling. Prepare yourselves for heartbreak!
P.S: for reference, think Barney/Robin and Marshall/Lily in How I Met Your Mother. Then you’ll get it.
20 Not Want To Go Home
We understand that you may have had the time of your life on your honeymoon, and you’ve developed something of a love for the area that you’re staying in. However, isn’t the whole point of marriage, you know, spending the rest of your life together?
When you go back you get to start that adventure and deal with everything that comes alongside it, and it doesn’t seem right to want to delay it. If it’s just a one off comment then that’s fine, but if you keep going on about it, then it leaves us questioning just how invested you actually are.
19 Immediately Start Think About Having Kids
Having children is a really big and important part of life, and it’s natural for any couple to want to move onto thinking about that type of thing once they’ve had their wedding. While that’s all well and good, it seems as if it might be the champagne talking above anything else.
Why? Because married couples should enjoy having time to themselves before they go down the route of kids. They should travel, see the world, enjoy each other’s company, and generally soak up their youth.
It doesn’t last forever, and that’s an important thing to remember in this instance.
18 Consume Way Too Much Every Night
Whether it be food or drink, nobody seems to know their limit when they’re on their honeymoon. You could probably allow for a little bit of indulgence here and there, but again, there are levels to this. We can all but guarantee that there are other people staying in relatively close proximity to you on your honeymoon. Because of that, we’d urge you to consider your own behaviour and how eccentric you’re being – because some of the other guests may just want to relax.
Moderation may not be one of your strong points, but we’d highly suggest that you try and make it so.
17 Wear Matching Outfits Together
We can defend a lot of things, and we mean a lot, but we’re not entirely sure that we can defend matching outfits.
Some will say it’s cute, but we’ll go ahead and reveal that we believe you’re just rubbing your relationship in the face of others. Feel free to do that when you’re back home, but you don’t need to be doing it when you’re surrounded by strangers.
Why? Because it’s just a little bit awkward, and it’s just a little bit too cringeworthy for our liking. Perhaps others disagree, but we’ve got a feeling that the majority will concur with our hypothesis.
16 Not Research Where They’re Going Before They Go
If you’re picking somewhere to go on your honeymoon because it’s either a popular destination or it ‘looks pretty’, then you should seriously consider hiring a travel advisor. Why? Well, in short, because it’s a really silly thing to do.
What if you get there and it’s nothing like you had initially imagined? It’s not all too difficult to picture a scenario in which that’s the case, especially if you put way more effort into the wedding than the honeymoon itself.
It can create some friction, and it kind of makes you come across as typical tourists – which is never really a good look, to be honest.
15 Use The Honeymoon Line To Get Free Things
It might be your honeymoon, but that doesn’t mean we’re going to give you a pass on asking for loads of free stuff. Sure, there are a few things you could probably go out of your way to get, but there’s a limit between being cheeky and being downright rude. You shouldn’t be taking advantage to the point where you think you’re some kind of king, even if the money you’ve paid would indeed imply that you are.
Pushing the boundaries is okay, but overstepping your mark is not. That’s kind of a general lesson to live by, in truth.
14 Get Serious Blues About Their Wedding
The warning signs are usually present within a marriage if you’re immediately getting wedding blues, even when you’re on your honeymoon. The honeymoon is part of the wedding process when you think about it, so why on earth are you getting depressed?
Not everyone can be a bride for the rest of their life, and that’s just the way the world works. You’ve had your time in the sunshine (quite literally), and it really is a first world problem to complain about the fact that it’s no longer your wedding day.
I mean come on, just consider the amenities that you get when you’re on your honeymoon. If that isn’t enough to persuade you to be a little bit more positive, then nothing will be.
13 Spend Time Writing Their Thank You Cards
Can’t you just do it when you get back?
You might want to get it out of the way early, but come on, on your honeymoon? This is quite literally the one time in your life when you’re supposed to be completely relaxed. Sure, you may enjoy doing the thank you cards, but if you leave them until you get back home, then it gives you something to look forward to.
It’s just awkward, especially if there’s only one of you doing it whereas the other one wants to go and do lots of fun activities. We aren’t saying that it’s not practical because it is, but practicality should probably go out of the window in this case.
12 Watch Netflix In Complete Silence
Everyone loves a good Netflix binge session from time to time – and us included. We really enjoy sitting back and just letting our troubles wash away, all in the name of watching either some fictional TV or some really fun documentaries. Of course, some people take this to the next level, and seem to develop some kind of Netflix obsession.
If you’re getting involved in this when you’re on your honeymoon, then you should probably take a second to step back and think about what you’re doing.
Watching TV at all on your honeymoon should be a little bit of a sin, but doing it in complete silence because you’re more focused on what your watching as opposed to your partner? It’s just wrong.
11 Use Pet Names All The Time - Even In Public
Stop it, please. Just stop.
Use a pet name for your partner’s contact entry on your phone or something. That sounds like a reasonable way of doing things, as opposed to using the names at every available opportunity. If you’re around other people then it’s just a little bit awkward, because they may not be quite as lovey dovey as you.
Plus, and we can’t understate this enough, they may not even know who the hell you’re talking about.
This all stems back to the idea of rubbing your relationship in the face of others, which we’ve never been big fans of.
10 Complain About How Much Time They’ve Gone For
If you go for just a few days on your honeymoon, you’ll complain it wasn’t long enough. If you go for 10 days or even two weeks, you’ll complain that it was far too long. There’s just no middle ground, and that can set a pretty bad precedent for the remainder of your relationship.
Just throw caution to the wind a little bit, guys. Or, alternatively, really give the length of your honeymoon some thought before you actually end up booking it. That way, you could probably avoid this whole problem altogether.
In short, though, you should probably just stop complaining.
9 Show Up Really Early At The Airport
While you may be advised to show up early to the airport, there are some couples that will take that far too literally.
Example: we’ve seen couples who have flights at around 4.30pm, and they’ve arrived at 10am. We understand that they want to be safe rather than sorry, but that’s taking things to a whole new level, isn’t it?
You’re just kind of wasting your time, and you’ll end up spending way more money than you’d initially planned because you don’t have anything to do. Plus, you’d probably have to wait an hour or two before you’re even allowed to go through security.
8 Go Dancing When They Really Can’t Dance
We’ve all been there, guys.
Dancing isn’t a pretty thing to see or do if you aren’t particularly good at it, but it’s even worse if you aren’t intoxicated and don’t have that excuse. Some couples will choose to either take lessons whilst on their honeymoon, which is a waste of time given how physically demanding it is, or they’ll just get up and freestyle for the world to see.
Neither of those options sound particularly appealing to us, and you could easily just cut out the middle man.
By that, of course, we mean you should do normal honeymoon stuff!
7 Get Couples Massages Together
This might just be us being incredibly weird, but aren’t couples massages, you know, weird?
I’d find it really, really weird if some guy or girl was massaging my girlfriend, just a few feet away from where I’m getting a massage myself. In most instances you need to pick the right kind of massage for you, too, otherwise you could end up with an experience that you certainly weren’t planning for.
The idea is nice in theory but when it comes down to the execution, it’s pretty hard for it not to be ever so slightly awkward.
Do you agree? Because we can imagine this one is pretty polarising.
6 The Guy Carries All Of The Girl’s Luggage
There’s a term in a relationship that many of you would’ve heard of before, and that term is ‘whipped’. It refers to a member of the aforementioned relationship, usually the man, who is quite clearly the one having to make the sacrifices.
That can get even more complicated in a marriage, and to be perfectly honest, this is one of the most cringeworthy examples of being whipped.
You’d think that luggage isn’t all that hard to carry, especially if you’ve divided it up between the two of you. Alas, for whatever reason, the girl in question has demanded that the guy carries everything. Ugh.
5 Go Hiking With Very Little Prep
Nobody wants to be answering an emergency call because you’ve either gassed out or broken something due to a lack of preparation.
Hiking is a pretty difficult thing to do if you aren’t in the right shape of mind to do it, and even if you are, it’s a challenge.
When it comes to honeymoons the temperature is either very hot or very cold, and both of those scenarios lead to difficult conditions in the world of hiking.
If you’re with a third party who is helping you out then it’s not too bad, but we’d actively encourage you to not go it alone.
4 Fall Asleep Way Too Early
You’ve had your dinner and you’ve got plans to go out on the town and party the night away. Then, the next thing you know, you’re waking up in bed and it’s the middle of the night.
We’ve all been in a scenario in which you fall asleep too early before plans, and it’s never pretty. You may have missed a specific appointment, or you might just be the kind of person who doesn’t like to waste your holiday.
Some will put it down to jet lag but in our experience, that’s nothing more than an excuse – and you won’t be able to change our mind on that.
3 Get Extremely Snuggly On The Flight
Are you trying to prove something? Because it really feels like you’re trying to prove something.
It’s all well and good getting cosy on the plane, but some couples take it too far. They may as well be holding up a sign saying “please give us attention, we’re about to go on our honeymoon”.
This is particularly bad when you are in a three seat aisle on the plane, and there’s actually a person next to you who quite clearly isn’t all too comfortable with what you’re doing.
It’s more arrogant than anything else, and we’re not really going to budge on that thought.
2 Use TripAdvisor Far Too Much
TripAdvisor is a really fun tool that gives you a great opportunity to scout out the best places to visit on holiday. Of course, while that’s all well and good, we personally feel like there needs to be a bit of room for some improvisation.
It’s nice to be spontaneous on holiday and especially on your honeymoon, because planning out every single thing you do based on the opinion of others never works out. You can probably get away with using it from time to time, but we personally wouldn’t go too far with it. Otherwise, you just end up looking a little bit silly.
1 Pose For Pictures ALL The Time
If you want to take lots of photos on your honeymoon then that’s perfectly acceptable, but doing so every two minutes (and prioritising it over talking to your partner) makes it feel a little bit unnatural. The best photos are the ones that come out of nowhere as opposed to the ones that feel far too manufactured, and we’re confident in saying most of you would agree with that.
Oh, and if you need other people to take photos for you then spread it out a bit, because they’re also probably trying to enjoy their holiday as well.