It's not always easy to take the metaphorical leap and book a flight, because not all of us are 100% comfortable with the prospect of flying thousands of miles in the air for an extended period of time. Still, it can be quite fun, and sometimes it can be quite easy for some individuals to abuse that fun for their own personal gain.
In equal measure, of course, if you're a good citizen and play by the rules, then there's a chance that you could be enjoying a flight of luxury in the form of an upgrade. That isn't something which is ever guaranteed to happen throughout the course of your life, but just think about how nice it'd be if one day, courtesy of a few simple guidelines, you get the call-up into first class.
We're well aware that a lot of people just want to get from point A to point B, which is probably why so many budget airlines are still in business to this day. Nevertheless, there's a fine line between a good passenger and a bad passenger, and we're here to try and lay out some of the do's and don'ts when it comes to how you should be enjoying your air travel.
We aren't going to try and dictate how you should live your life, but come on, there are certain things that you just don't do, especially if you want to be respectful to the people who are just trying to do their jobs. Sure, you may not have a care in the world about any of that, but there are a lot of people who would look at you and think 'what a BLEEP'.
20 KICKED OFF: A Few Too Many Drinks - Think About It
Look, a lot of people who travel enjoy a drink or two before they get on the plane, and there's just no getting around that. For some people, it's a great way to start off your holiday regardless of whether or not you're on your own, with your family or travelling with your partner or friends.
Alas, there's a limit, and you need to be fully aware of that limit unless you want a one-way trip back to the terminal. If you're all over the place then you can easily be viewed as a danger to the rest of the passengers, and while it may seem unfair, you need to behave in a manner that you'd expect the rest of the passengers on board to behave.
19 KICKED OFF: Intimidation - Not Smart
This can come in many different shapes and sizes, but at the end of the day, being intimidating is something that is always going to be bad for you. If you just so happen to be a bodybuilder or someone with a generally large physique then it's a different story, but if you're actively going out of your way to try and prove a point, then that's a bad move.
This is especially true when it comes to the crew because they're the ones who have the power to make these kinds of judgement calls. There's a chance you may not be doing any of this intentionally but if there's the slightest of hints that there's something fishy going on, then you'll probably be coming home from your holiday earlier than you thought.
18 KICKED OFF: Far Too Loud - Tone It Down
One thing that everyone hates when they're travelling is an obnoxious individual sitting either next to them or in their general space. It just makes for an unpleasant experience for all involved, and while you may not mean to be so loud, you've got to take the feelings of others into consideration.
It's especially bad if there's wifi available on the plane (yes, this is a thing now) because the person in question may be attempting to record some kind of message or talk on the phone to a loved one.
It may not be 'fair', but if you're being disruptive, then you've got to go.
17 UPGRADED: Seat Swap - A Nice Gesture
It's always nice to be nice, and that's what we're going to focus on here as we introduce our first 'upgraded' entry. More often than not there are issues with booking things, and that's just a way of life. As such, it's not uncommon for people to accidentally book themselves in seats that aren't next to their loved ones or friends.
So then, if that's the case, or there's another kind of seat-related emergency, you should volunteer to give up your seat. That'll indicate that you're a stand-up guy or girl, and in the long run, it could lead to an upgrade dependant on how the flight crew is feeling on that day.
16 KICKED OFF: Breaking The Plane - Don't Be Stupid
A lot of people reading this will enjoy flying on budget airlines, and there's nothing wrong with that. In fact, we'd actively encourage using them, especially if you live in Europe because there are a sea of different airlines for you to use if you want to save some major cash.
Still, whether it's a budget airline or a nice one, it can be easier than you think to accidentally break the plane. This can come in many different shapes and sizes, but the bottom line is this: if you break a part of the plane then there's a very good chance that your status on the flight in question is going to be reviewed.
15 KICKED OFF: Starting A Fight - Rocky Balboa Style
It doesn't matter whether the fight is justified or not, if you start a fight when you're in the air, that can cause all different kinds of problems. Given how claustrophobic most planes are to begin with it shouldn't come as any kind of shock or surprise that this is frowned upon, especially given how much distress it can cause based on the severity of the issue.
You just need to try and keep your composure the best you can, because otherwise, you could have a big problem on your hands. After all, landing yourself on the 'no fly' list isn't exactly something to put on the bucket list.
14 KICKED OFF: Being Sick - Unfortunate But True
More often than not we can't help being ill or sick, because it's just the way the world works. We can do everything within our power to prevent it, but sometimes, there's just no way to avoid the matter. Hell, even if you remained locked in your house 24 hours a day you'd probably still catch something.
So then, while the term 'kicked off' may seem a bit much, it's definitely fair to suggest that an emergency landing could be necessary if you're having some issues with your health. Even if it isn't that serious, a doctor may need to check you over before you even take off.
13 UPGRADED: Be Famous - Look Who It Is!
For those of you who don't know, the gentleman above is Casey Neistat. He's a great vlogger on YouTube who has been posting daily/weekly updates about his life in New York City for a few years now, and he's a must watch for anyone who enjoys the video streaming platform.
So then, it should come as no surprise that he is the perfect example of this entry title. Due to his fame, and the fact that he likes reviewing airlines, a lot of companies tend to give him upgrades - seemingly so he can make videos about it.
We aren't criticising him for that, either, because he doesn't seem to make any money directly from the airline because of it (although the ad revenue is probably pretty sweet).
12 KICKED OFF: The Plane Door - Don’t Be Silly
We've seen reports of it littered around the web, but let's just bring it up again for the sake of it: please stop trying to open the plane door. It doesn't make you cool or clever and you're not only endangering your own life, but the lives of every single person on board.
Seriously, what do these people think is going to happen? They'll suddenly discover that they have Superman-like abilities? That's not how the world works, and if this is the reason why you're thrown off of a plane, then it couldn't be more justified (at least in our opinion).
11 KICKED OFF: Lingering Smell - Get Some Deodorant
It doesn't matter whether it's courtesy of something that's been sprayed, smoked, or your general odour - if you smell particularly bad, then it can be viewed as either a hazard or a disturbance to others on board. That might not seem all too fair, and it probably isn't, but it's something that is in the regulations of more than one major airline across the United States and beyond.
Sometimes you can't help it and that can bring up a series of other issues if you decide to challenge the airline on their decision, but you should rest easy in knowing that this is much rarer than some of the other examples that we've provided.
10 KICKED OFF: Crying Baby - Apologies, Newborns
The biggest stereotype of all when it comes to nightmare plane journeys is having a screaming baby, or toddler, on board. The whole experience is pretty traumatising for a lot of kids and we can understand why, from the overwhelming amount of people to the sensation of your ears popping.
It's also understandable that other passengers would be left frustrated by the child screaming and crying, and in some cases, you'll be asked to get a later flight when the child is in a calmer state of mind. Again, this is slightly rarer than the other entries, but it's still something to think about.
9 UPGRADED: Style It Up - Stylin’ And Profilin’
It's nice to look nice and that's something that most of us can agree on. While it isn't always great to judge a book by its cover, though, dressing to impress when you're heading onto a plane can sometimes be cause for an upgrade.
That isn't always the case but if you look the part and you have the aura of an important individual, then some airlines will allow you to use some of the empty 'first class' facilities. Of course, style doesn't always mesh together perfectly with comfort, so you need to have a long, hard think about what your priorities are.
8 KICKED OFF: Going Against Authority - Listen To The Crew
While the flight crew may seem really friendly throughout the course of your time in the air (and they are), don't be fooled into thinking that they have no authority. In reality, they can often serve as the judge, jury and executioner of deciding your fate on the plane.
So, it stands to reason that if they tell you to do something, you should probably do it. If you don't then you run the risk of receiving a warning, especially if it would assist you in, you know, being safe.
At the end of the day, that's their main priority, and you have to realise that they get a lot of abuse as it is - so you shouldn't add to that.
7 KICKED OFF: Birthday Suit - Whoops
We don't 'need' to explain this one to be perfectly honest, but we're going to do so anyway. Look, if you either show up to your flight without any clothes on (or with minimal clothes) or you decide to take them off during your flight, then we can pretty much guarantee you won't be flying with that airline - or any other - for quite some time.
It's a very simple rule and unless someone legitimately has a mental disorder, there's no real excuse as to why you'd do this. Then again, the earlier entry regarding a few too many adult beverages could always come into play, but that still doesn't justify it.
6 KICKED OFF: Being Too Large - Are they even allowed to do that?
Discrimination is something that we'd all love to see being cut out of everyday life, but it isn't always a possibility. As such, some people may find this entry to be a little bit 'too much', but trust us when we say that it's something that happens on a day to day basis.
If you happen to weigh more than the usual individual, then there's a chance you'll be asked to depart the plane. Usually, this is done as a safety precaution and nothing more, but it's worth contacting the airline beforehand and finding out what the situation is.
5 UPGRADED: Be Punctual - Always Important
Again, it's not exactly rocket science, people.
If you show up to your flight on time and you're one of the first on the plane, then that'll improve your chances of an upgrade. If you're polite and don't cause any issues upon boarding, then that will also improve your chances of receiving an upgrade.
Do you see where we're going with this? It isn't exactly hard to be punctual in the modern age and we'd stand by that in any scenario, unless, of course, you really have been pushed to the edge. Still, you should probably see this entry as something that you should engage in even if you aren't trying to enter first class.
4 KICKED OFF: Allergy Issues - How Bad Is It?
Allergies are annoying things especially if you're allergic to nuts or something of a similar nature. It often can't be prevented and even if you have the equipment necessary to cope with it, you may not always have it with you throughout the course of a flight.
Your allergies would have to be pretty strong in order to warrant a reaction on a flight, but trust us, it's a possibility. If you have a bad reaction and there's no way of it subsiding, then an emergency landing could be put into place.
Or, you know, you may just be forcefully removed, which is unfortunately far too regular of an occurrence these days.
3 KICKED OFF: Being Too Cheeky - Limit Yourself
From flirting with the flight attendant a little bit too much to just making some downright rude remarks, being 'cheeky' is something that allows you to run the risk of being chucked off the plane.
Sure, it's something to pass the time, but you need to be cautious and think about what you're saying. If that's your natural personality then all you need to do is tone it down a little bit, and if you're putting it on because you're getting carried away with the thrill of going on holiday, then you need to just try and take a step back before realising what it is you're doing.
2 KICKED OFF: The Mile-High Club - You Know What We Mean
Everyone knows what the Mile High Club is. If you don't know what the MHC (Mile High Club) is then you're likely either too young to know what it means, or you're far too innocent.
Essentially, what happens between a couple behind closed doors is their own business 99% of the time, but when it happens on a plane, it's something that isn't considered to be all too 'morally right'. That doesn't always get in the way of some passengers, but trust us, you're better off just taking the high road on this one.
1 UPGRADED: Loyalty - The Key To Success
Fans of Love Island will probably think that we've turned into Georgia, but that isn't the case.
Loyalty is an important thing in any walk of life, and as such, that goes for flying with specific airlines, too. If you're known to be a frequent flyer with a particular airline then there's a good chance that one day, you'll receive an upgrade of some sort courtesy of that loyalty.
It isn't a guarantee as you well know, but the bigger the airline, the more likely it seems that you'll be able to bump your way up into first class.
All you really need to do in order to lock it down is follow a handful of the guidelines on this list, and you'll be well on your way to a relaxing and enjoyable time.